Holding my tongue...
Maybe God is constantly testing me, because I always seem to be in the mist of an awkward situation where I typically resort to just "holding my tongue." If I'm offended by someone, I will more than likely not say anything about it and just smile it off just to keep the peace which isn't always the best.
Here are some examples of situations that I've held my tongue on that maybe I should have spoken up about...
1. Negative comments I've seen about refugees. Stop assuming and start healthy conversations. You'd be surprise the love and level of hospitality many have to share if you were open to starting a friendship. I've personally been blessed beyond words by a budding friendship with a (new to US/nashville) Syrian family!!
2. Asking a stay at home mom "if they are bored being at home yet?" This annoys me especially since I hear it all the time. It's like staying home is synonymous with staying locked in doors or something. I actually get to spend much more time now participating in my passions, like volunteer work. Yes some moments arent as exciting, but let's just be real, I've had boring days when I worked a job but interestingly enough no one cared as much then!!! I've been bored in school, bored at EVERY graduation, bored in conferences, and seriously I've even had some boring moments in church before.
I don't question a mom's choice to work outside the home so please respect my choice to be home with my kids. I'm doing what matters to my family whether or not it sounds glamorous. (What? Cleaning up messes and hearing fifty requests for snacks each day doesn't sound glamorous to you?? ;) I can get a job when I want to, but I can't ever get my time back, so no worries I'm good with my decision. Thanks
3. When someone says something that could be perceived as racially insensitive and when confronted they mention the friend they had in grade school or wherever that is "X,Y,Z race". Please stop. I've witnessed this and it's embarrassing and getting pretty old. Its perfectly ok to just say sorry I didn't intend to sound offensive or just talk it out and move on.
4. Specific comments made about people who rent vs people who buy a home. After going on several mission trips, you come to realize just how blessed you are without labels that we place on ourselves in America. I rent currently. I want to buy, and trust I will buy a home one day when God sees fit for me to do so (claiming it). It's not a race so I try to focus on where God has me now. I'm just grateful to live indoors, in a clean, loving, and safe place. Thank God!
5. Once I had a white male Doctor put his hand in my hair and said its interesting you are wearing your natural hair. You don't see this much nowadays because everyone wears weaves and fake hair. Talk about a bite my tongue situation! I smiled...thinking to myself-Doctor how about we just focus on my throat pain.
I really wanted to say to him, black women wearing their natural hair is actually VERY common now. Seriously it's much more common now than I remember when I first started my perm free life about thirteen years ago. I love my hair. I also enjoyed wearing my hair colored, in braids/twists w/ extensions, and it was cute when it was permed too ;). Hair is just hair...
These examples are not huge mind blowing situations but my prayer is to not shy away from opportunities in the moment to speak up. I want to find a balance in my life with speaking up when necessary and knowing when it is best to just shut my mouth in order to keep the peace as well.
Lord, set up a guard for my mouth; keep watch at the door of my lips. Psalm 141:3 HCSB
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