About two years ago I was on social media much more. I was posting pictures, updating my timeline, commenting and liking pictures up a storm. I wouldn't say I was a fanatic but I was definitely more in the loop of things. When my first daughter Malachi was born I would post monthly update pictures and whatever she was doing that was either cute or hilarious.
I’m not sure if it was after my second daughter was born or maybe it was even while I was pregnant, that I was either too sick, too tired or whatever to post. I slowly started doing a random dump of pictures every few months, which eventually turned to every six months, and so on. I definitely also noticed that during the presidential campaign and when several black men were shot and killed by cops, being on Facebook and Instagram felt more and more depressing for me. I was angry, sad, and frustrated. Race and politics covered my timeline and the ignorant comments the ensued caused me to avoid it as much as I could.
Then I had a newborn and a toddler at home that required most of my attention. Going from one kid to two kids seriously rocked my world. Between being exhausted and stressed out, social media was just the last of my cares. There are super women out there that can do it all, but I just didn't feel like I was one of them. Sometimes I would think there was something wrong with me when compared to all my Facebook mom friends that looked fabulous, well rested, and loving life when I was just barely surviving. I was desperately just trying to figure out all of my responsibilities and expectations as a wife, mom, and a woman of God.
Trust my posts wouldn't have been that awesome anyways unless people wanted to hear about nursing issues, a financial setback, how to get a toddler to stop whining (seriously how?? I really still NEED to know). Would anyone have cared to hear me complaining about functioning on a few hours of "interrupted" sleep, what to cook for dinner that would require me not to cook anything at all or if it is even possible to go to the bathroom in peace without a child in tow? Seriously being in the same outfit for days on end could never compete with say pictures of being at a Beyonce concert or on a beach someplace relaxing… so really what’s the point haha.
I've actually enjoyed my hiatus from social media. I meet up with friends and go on dates with my husband that surprise, I haven't posted a picture of. Now it’s kind of cool for me to just be in the moment without always feeling like I need to snap a picture or maybe 5 because we all know the first few never look right anyways. Don't get me wrong there is absolutely nothing wrong with posting. I really enjoy reading and seeing pictures of other people's lives. It was just hard for me to not scroll through my social media pages and look up and an hour had gone by. I just didn't have the time for that so I had to prioritize.
Well now that my life has calmed down...sike... like a very itty teeny bit, I feel like I don't even understand how to navigate social media anymore. Also let’s face it with Trump in office, things feel crazier than before with politics and racism. Sometimes I feel like I can't even keep up with technology. So this must be how the older generation feels? I recently got a Twitter account (yes I'm slow) mainly to share my blog posts, and I’m never on it because I really don't know what to do or where to even start. I have three people following me-two of which are family so its safe to safe I'm not exactly #winning on Twitter ;-). I never feel like I have the time to invest but hopefully I wont stay clueless forever.
I suppose in the end, all that matters is that I am doing what I am called to do. I know that being a wife, mom, writing and openly sharing the craziness called “my life” with others is part of that calling no matter what medium I decide to use. So thank you to all that support this blog! Thank you for taking the time to read what I write. You are appreciated!